hello hope - well 6 p.m. tonight rolled around and no phone call or my father did not show up - i called him and he said that he thought in yesterday's conversation he thought i had said that i would call him - well i told him that i thought he was going to call me and that we were going to walk around the waterfront so i could show him my banners he said that he had made a special trip to the waterfront in the morning (before 8 a.m.) to walk around to look at the banners and did not see the banners that i described (meaning WHAT??? lol) I told him of the area of my banners and he said once again that he misunderstood the where they were obviously - well we continued talking and i said to him that i would like to see him and his reply? that he was surprised that i expressed such a sentiment after my 6 page letter... of which he read that i completely hated the clan -

okay hope - my COMPLETE letter is on my blog - www.shesgotpersonality.blogspot.com scroll down and you will find it, very quickly - it is not a letter stating i hate the clan - it is ME expressing my hurt feelings and confusion towards my father -

i said no it was not i hated the clan letter it was about him calling me a fat lazy whore, why did he do that? his reply? we are not talking about me,
what i said, i said dad, we NEVER talk about you, we have NEVER talked about you or US and yes the letter was COMPLETELY about you and your statement ((i.e. HOW did he miss that?))

i told him i loved him and he IS and always will be my father and i will always be his daughter THAT will never change - he abruptly changed that topic and said what else would you like to know about the trailer? as i had asked him if it was okay for me to paint the exterior green - he said he liked the colour i chose - i said Great - he continued, anything else you would like to know about the trailer? the trailer is michelle's and mine, of which we let you stay there at a VERY reduced rent "until you shoot yourself in the foot"

hope what does that mean? SHOOT yourself in the foot?

i just let him talk - silently wondering what the hell???

he continued, you can stay there until you decide to leave -

again i thought? what? what does that mean now? doesn't that just contradict what he just said?

i answered, well i am in school until next march, then i don't know -

he said then i would need 2 months notice so i could find someone else to be there, it is just a property WE own that we rent out to you FOR A VERY REDUCED RENT

i let that slide and instead asked, okay that is understood, what about us?

he said what us? your letter spellt it out you hate the clan

my reply, NO it did not, that letter was just my confusion about you and your statements to me thru out my life, and i think that we need to have a VERY LONG talk, I AM YOUR DAUGHTER, YOU ARE MY FATHER, I would like you to stop by sometime -

Why?

Because YOU ARE MY FATHER AND I AM YOUR DAUGHTER -

Him - I need to go I am working on the water line here - We have no water -

Me - No way Dad, you are not ending a phone call that way, not this time. Is that it? You don't want me to contact you anymore then? Do you want me to get another Dentist? Do you want Zero contact from me?

Him - I will stop by sometime. I don't know when.

Me - That is all I ask. Thank you.

CLICK

HELP ME. Define Please.

Thank you.

Why is everything/everyone LEAVING me at this time? Narda - My confidante for the last 6 years. And now my Father "misreading" my letter?

I am so confused. Hurt and crying right now. I am feeling so very alone right now. I am single... And no family other than my Father here. I reached out to another Person that I have called my Chosen Mom "Jan" and phoned her today and she has not returned my call. She was with my Father for 33 years. I always had an "inkling" that she was "in" my life because I was her "link" to my Father - and now that I am no longer in "direct" contact with him she is no longer returning my phone calls etc etc?

Why is everything ENDING at the same time? I feel so very alone right now, and scared. Not beaten just scared. I am also just PMSing up the yingyang hahahaha So the tears are 99% that too HAHAHAHA

Thanks for letting me vent/write to you Hope. One day I will give you a hug in person LOL But me broke right now hahahahahaha

Hugs n Luv,

Char
sorry I did not address what else you said in your email bit lost right now